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Interview Patty

10 Words to Get What You Want

Houston Business Women Management Consultant

1. 'Because' - “Because” is the conduit you will use to explain your motivations for every element of your request. In his book Influence, Robert Cialdini describes this as a “request + reason” and proves that this combination significantly increases the likelihood that your request will be obliged.

2. 'Thanks' - A simple thanks is an expression of immediate gratitude, and if you start your conversation with it, you’ll start everything off on a good note. You’ll show that you’re appreciative, which will make people more interested and willing to help you out. Something like “thanks for your time” at the beginning of a meeting (or at the end) is all it takes to establish that positive tone.

3. 'You' - When extending requests, too many people make it all about themselves. They'll say things like, “I want this because I need it,” explaining their personal motivations or the logical reasons why they want it. Instead, try framing the conversation in the perspective of the person you’re talking to.

4. 'If' - “If” holds a ton of power because it gives you the opportunity to break a situation down to its most basic terms by exploring hypothetical outcomes. As long as you’ve done your research (or at least some brainstorming), you’ll come out in a good position. For example, consider: “If we go with option A, we’ll see increases in both cost and productivity, and if we go with option B, everything will remain the same.”

5. 'Could' - Using the word “could” implies openness, unlike the word “won’t” or “never.” This keeps the conversation positive, and further allows you to explore your hypothetical future outcomes, which is especially handy when your conversational partner has a counterargument or request for you. For example, “I could take on the extra work, but I’d prefer it if I had more flexibility on the deadline.”

6. 'We' - Like the word “you,” “we” takes some of the focus off your own self-interest. As a first-line effect, this makes you seem less ego-centric and more welcoming. As a second-line effect, it implies that the two of you are a single unit, and that any positive benefit for you will be a positive benefit for them.

7. 'Together' - “Together” works much the same way that “we” does. It implies a degree of familiarity and cooperation, providing a kind of conversational lubricant to make your requests easier to swallow. Anything you can do to make your request (and hypothetical future) seem like a mutual opportunity is going to help you here.

8. 'Fact' - The word “fact” can help you out significantly in your attempts at persuasion. There’s only one caveat -- the facts you claim have to be actual facts, supportable with empirical evidence or research of some kind. Still, using more facts in your dialogue will help you strengthen your position, and secure a more persuasive angle for your discussion.

9. 'Open' - During the conversation, you won’t agree with everything the other person tells you, and you won’t comply with every request. But shutting these requests down with a “no” or a “never” is negative and counterproductive. Instead, state that you’re “open” to the idea, but further negotiation will be required before you fully agree.

10. 'Will' - “Will” is the word we use to switch to future tense, and it’s a powerful word because it implies what happens after the conversation is over with a degree of certainty. Stating that you “will” do something as a direct action provides a clear vision and mitigates the possibility of miscommunication.

Source: Entrepreneur

Patty Block, President and Founder of The Block Group, established her company to advocate for women-owned businesses, helping them position their companies for strategic growth. Charting the course for impactful, sustainable, profitable businesses, the beacon is control: of your strategic direction, your money, your time, your staffing, and your ability to bring in business. The Block Group brings together the people, resources and ideas that build results.

Houston Business Women Management Consultant.

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