11 Negotiating Tips for Women
Keys to Developing Negotiating Skills
1) Prepare yourself for any negotiation by doing your homework. - Get a clear picture of what you want, and write down your objectives. You must define your low points and high points of what you want and bring notes if you need them.
2) Stay calm and non-reactive. - Your tone of voice is very important. You can be assertive AND calm. Make sure that you are confident and dress properly. Say what you need to say with authority.
3) Feel good about yourself. - And do whatever you need to feel in power.
4) Anytime you have an agreement, get it in writing and signed. - because people always change their minds.
5) Don’t sound defensive in the face of a negative during your negotiation conversation. - Whining or finishing a request on a high pitched tone of voice will give you away and illustrate your weakness. As #2 above states – say it with authority! Also, try not to respond with “but…”
6) Don’t cry. - Having a plan and notes will help. If you feel you might start to tear up or cry, take a very deep breath, and another one, think about your next point you want to make…and begin speaking again. Crying in a professional setting while negotiating will weaken your position.
7) In line with #1 above plan ahead and identify what standard objections you might encounter to your request/argument/proposal/discussion, - and then practice your responses to them so that you sound smooth, confident and capable of handling any negative that comes up in the conversation. Stumbling and fumbling with words and responses will make you sound unprepared and defensive.
8) Don’t repeat the negative! If they say: - “That’s too much,” your response should not be, “Oh, you think it’s too much; well it’s really not because….” or if they say, “No, I want to think about it,” you don’t want to say “Oh, you want to think about it; may I ask what you need to think about?” Both responses simply reinforce the NEGATIVE. Yet a natural “knee-jerk” reaction is to repeat a negative. So, try #9 below instead…
9) Do acknowledge the objection but in a POSITIVE way without re-stating the negative: “I can appreciate what you are saying however, something (else) to consider is INSERT ONE POSITIVE BENEFIT STATEMENT ABOUT YOUR REQUEST.
10) In addition to not letting your tone of voice indicate any disappointment or frustration in their reluctance to accept your position/request/offer, - if you are face-to-face, don’t let your body language (crossed arms, frown, nervous mannerisms like clicking and un-clicking your pen), indicate you are feeling nervous or defensive.
11) Finally, avoid any condescending or argumentative tones and words. - Their concerns and worries are just as legitimate to them as yours are to you, and you want to be respectful of those sentiments as you provide your rational responses to them.
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Patty Block, President and Founder of The Block Group, established her company to advocate for women-owned businesses, helping them position their companies for strategic growth. Charting the course for impactful, sustainable, profitable businesses, the beacon is control: of your strategic direction, your money, your time, your staffing, and your ability to bring in business. The Block Group brings together the people, resources and ideas that build results.
Business management consultant.
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